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This is my personal blog which I began in February 2001. I called it The Obvious? when I wrote anonymously and chose the name to reflect the fact I have to overcome my inhibitions about stating the obvious!

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« One small step? Some time | Main | Truth and Jaguars The combination »
Sunday
Jan202002

Truth and Jaguars The combination

Truth and Jaguars
The combination of my post on truth yesterday and Chris Locke's EGR post on black holes, depression and the breath of jaguars got me thinking.

My sense of happiness is so linked in with my inherited sense of good and bad. I have so many wonderful things in my life, my wife, my kids, where I live, where I work, my health, my skills...and on and on....and yet, if I feel I have been bad, I can obsess about what is wrong in my life. I filter out anything positive and home in on the negative like a heat seeking missile.

I have read dozens of books on how to be different and do try at an intellectual level. But deep down, at a soul level, there are still the same old scripts running..... good - bad, success - failure, all or nothing.

There are some big lessons I am here to learn. There are days I get close to learning them and then pull back. Why do I keep pulling back? It's like there is a big lesson on the way and I'm waiting for it....

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